Meth-Gator Warning

The latest summer blockbuster.

“On a more or less serious note: Folks…please don’t flush your drugs m’kay. When you send something down the sewer pipe it ends up in our retention ponds for processing before it is sent down stream. Now our sewer guys take great pride in releasing water that is cleaner than what is in the creek, but they are not really prepared for meth. Ducks, Geese, and other fowl frequent our treatment ponds and we shudder to think what one all hyped up on meth would do. Furthermore, if it made it far enough we could create meth-gators in Shoal Creek and the Tennessee River down in North Alabama. They’ve had enough methed up animals the past few weeks without our help. So, if you need to dispose of your drugs just give us a call and we will make sure they are disposed of in the proper way.”

The “methed up animals” is likely a reference to Limestone County’s “attack squirrel” case that made headlines across the country. Deputies say that suspect, Mickey Paulk, fed his pet squirrel meth to make it more aggressive. While on the run, Paulk denied this on Facebook Live and on the radio.