Monday, July 07, 2008

50 office-speak phrases you love to hate

The BBC has the 50 office-speak phrases you love to hate.

My favorite one comes from a former customer of mine from L.A.  They referred to any problems as “opportunities.”  So I’d get a call saying something like, “I have some opportunities that I’d like to discuss with you,” when what he really meant was, “our server has crashed and we’re losing $5 million an hour.” 

Oh well, I guess it made them feel better.

(6) Comments
Posted by Owen at 1751 hrs
Culture

  1. I just ran into this the other day.  I was handed a failing project to re-write an existing application with no customer requirements or details other than “The application is http://,,,” and we want it re-written in .NET.  Of course it’s wanted tomorrow and my boss told me “It’s generating a lot of attention VERY high up”.  I told him I don’t know anything about this code, system, application, or the users.  I said it’s like sending him to MS to re-write Excel in Java, and to have it done next week.  He responded with “Consider it a challenge and rise to it.”  My next response is going to be a big “FU”.  It’s coming….

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on July 07, 2008 at 1954 hrs


  2. Challenge and Feedback are two of my “Favorites”

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on July 07, 2008 at 2012 hrs


  3. We are facing insurmountable opportunities!

    Posted by Tom McMahon on July 07, 2008 at 2125 hrs


  4. Tom, I concur.  To your point, we must leverage and position these opportunities to maximize our ROI.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on July 08, 2008 at 0548 hrs


  5. hmmph. Just the use of the word “office” as a verb.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on July 08, 2008 at 0844 hrs


  6. At the end of the day, we’ll have had a “Come to Jesus” meeting.  The lynchpin will be the leverage of the two-legged stool.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on July 09, 2008 at 0932 hrs


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